(Baton Rouge, LA — May 20, 2015) – Not wanting to become the next state facing boycotts due to its stance on religious freedom, Louisiana’s legislators yesterday killed a religious-objections bill that could have been used to discriminate against gays and lesbians.
Unfazed, Governor Bobby Jindal (R-LA) quickly issued an Executive Order to override the legislature and put the discriminatory practices into place.
“Jindal needed this vote,” said a political consultant, speaking on condition of anonymity. “He’s thinking of running for president in 2016, and he needs all the Tea Partyist and conservative support he can get.
“This legislation, in his mind, makes him a credible conservative force. He was going to get it rammed through as Louisiana law no matter what, and he wasn’t going to let a 10-2 vote defeat him.”
Understandably, Louisiana residents are now afraid of becoming the nation’s latest laughingstock, and business owners are bracing for a severe economic downturn. One only has to look to Indiana to gauge the potential fallout from Jindal’s unilateral action.
As of July 1, Indiana’s businesses will now be free to refuse to serve those who ask for services which go against the religious beliefs of said businesses, thanks to the state’s Religious Freedom Restoration Act.
For his part, Governor Mike Pence (R-IN) was surprised by the visceral reaction to a piece of legislation. The signing of the law immediately drew threats of boycotts by organizations, associations, and politicians from other states that usually do business in Indiana.
Indiana businesses have already been casualties in this “war” on common sense; both the 111 Cakery and Memories Pizza – whose owners proudly proclaimed that they would not serve homosexual clients – have gone out of business.
“For me, the most striking thing to come out of this episode is that Jindal is implementing an Executive Order which will make it OK to discriminate,” said a political scientist, speaking on condition of anonymity. “I mean, has he looked in a mirror lately? He’s Indian-American. He looks different than most of the angry, aged, Christian White men who belong to the Republican Party. I have to wonder if he’s capable of comprehending the true meaning of irony?”