Today’s Tally: Michelle Obama 1, Inbred Hicks 0

Beverly Whaling (R-WV)

Beverly Whaling

(Clay, WV — November 15, 2016) – The election of Donald Trump (R-NY) as President of the United States has helped open the floodgates of racial animosity and hatred, and it has been repeated again and again in some of America’s largest cities and towns.

But outrage can still be generated from incidents in the smallest of places.

The mayor of Clay, WV – a town of about 500, 459 of which are blood relatives, calling each other father or mother or sister or brother or husband or wife – was forced to resign today over controversial Facebook comments.

Remarkably, the mayor’s comments themselves were neither offensive nor racist.

Mayor Beverly Whaling (R-WV) responded to a racist posting by Director Pamela Ramsey Taylor of the Clay County Development Corporation. In praising the elevation of Melania Trump to first lady, Taylor posted:

“It will be so refreshing to have a classy, beautiful, dignified First Lady back in the White House.”
Pamela Ramsey Taylor

Pamela Ramsey Taylor

It was her next comment, however, which began the firestorm:

“I’m tired of seeing a Ape in heels.”

Taylor has since been fired from her position.

“Quite frankly, I don’t know how she got the job,” said an observer, speaking on condition of anonymity. “How can you obtain the title of ‘Director’ and not know how to phrase even the simplest of sentences? I mean, who doesn’t know when to use an ‘a’ vs. ‘an’ in a sentence? I guess that’s inbreeding for you.”

Michelle Obama

Michelle Obama

Whaling’s response to Taylor is what got her in hot water:

“Just made my day Pam.”

“It’s not the contents of her post,” said a social media expert, speaking on condition of anonymity. “It’s her condoning of an extremely racist, hateful, and insensitive comment that has caused her this trouble.

“It’s a shame that we’re seeing comments like this in 2016. Given the way the presidential election went, I guess we should expect it. But I wish we could get past these hurtful stereotypes. There’s just no place for them in today’s America.

“Now, I understand that Whalen has finally resigned. It took her a while to get to the courthouse and submit her letter of resignation because her 1980 Chevy Citation is still up on those cinder blocks on her front lawn. That, plus the door to her outhouse got stuck for a brief time.”

Still, there are those Americans who agree 100% with Whalen, claiming that Michelle Obama hasn’t upheld the dignity of past first ladies. In 2009, she caused a national uproar when her first official portrait featured her in a sleeveless outfit.

Melania Trump

Melania Trump

“Can you imagine, the First Lady of the United States, showing off her arms?” asked a female West Virginia Obama detractor, speaking on condition of anonymity. “Now, with Melania [Trump], we’re getting a real lady. I agree with Pam; we’re getting a classy and dignified woman. And it’s about time!”

When reminded that Melania Trump has staged nude photo shoots, the female West Virginia Obama detractor spat at the reporter through her one tooth, reached into her purse – adorned with a Confederate flag – and pulled out a .22 caliber pistol. The reporter ran for their life.

Then there are those who find the behavior of Taylor and Whaling deplorable but are quick to point out that they’ve seen worse.

“We had an incident up in Clifton (NJ) several years ago,” said a Michelle Obama historian, speaking on condition of anonymity, “whereby the person used the term ‘an ape in Huckapoos’ to describe the first lady. Now that was really uncalled for.”