National Insecurity

Michael Flynn

Michael Flynn

(Washington, DC — February 14, 2017) – Flynngate hit a fever pitch today following last night’s resignation of Michael Flynn as Donald Trump’s (R-NY) National Security Advisor after just 24 days on the job.

And the mounting evidence shows him to be a real Flynn-Flan Man.

Flynn had multiple contacts with Sergey Kislyak, the Russian Ambassador to the United States, before Chancellor Squirrelhead was sworn in on January 20.

For the record, that’s illegal.

In addition, Flynn lied to Mike Pence (R-IN) and others last month – including the Federal Bureau of Investigations (FBI) – when they inquired about his Russian dealings. He promised that he had not discussed the possibility of the easing or removal of American sanctions on Russia, put in place when Russia invaded Crimea in 2014, once Barack Obama (D-IL) was out of office.

Mike Pence (R-IN)

Mike Pence

He did, in fact, have those discussions. For the record, that’s illegal, too.

Chancellor Squirrelhead is seen as being both pro-Russia and pro-[Russian President Vladimir] Putin, which is not a surprise given his investments in America’s former Cold War nemesis. Between his financial interests and his treasonous request that Russia purposely hack Hillary Clinton’s (D-NY) E-mail account, removal of the sanctions seemed not an “if” question but a “when” question.

Flynn’s resignation letter said he had provided “incomplete information” when discussing what he had done, and when he had done it.

“In other words, he’s a treasonous liar,” said a legal analyst, speaking on condition of anonymity. “Just like his boss! So it’s a shame he’s leaving; he’s a real protégé of Chancellor Squirrelhead’s.”

But the scandal doesn’t end there, as the revelations about Flynn’s Russian involvement were known last month by White House officials – including Chancellor Squirrelhead.

“The leader of this country knew his National Security Advisor was having illegal contacts with one of our biggest enemies,” said a political scientist, speaking on condition of anonymity. “This is about as astounding as Richard Nixon (R-CA) personally ordering the Watergate break-in. And just as stupid.

Sean Spicer

Sean Spicer

“How can you have a National Security Advisor who jeopardizes our national security?”

As for the White House, it doesn’t appear to know whether it’s coming or going with respect to Flynn. Press Secretary of the Week Sean Spicer indicated that Chancellor Squirrelhead asked Flynn to resign:

“Whether or not [Flynn] actually misled [Pence] was the issue, and that was ultimately what led to the president asking for and accepting the resignation of General Flynn.”
The Skeletal Kellyanne Conway

The Skeletal Kellyanne Conway

But The Skeletal Kellyanne Conway, the recently-counseled White House Counselor, had a different explanation, saying that the resignation was Flynn’s idea:

“The president is very loyal. He’s a very loyal person. And by nighttime, Mike Flynn had decided it was best to resign. He knew he became a lightning rod, and he made that decision. And I spoke with the president this morning. He asked me to speak on his behalf and to reiterate that Mike Flynn had resigned.”

“They’re such a bunch of pathetic liars that they can’t even get their lies straight,” said a political analyst, speaking on condition of anonymity. “It’s really pretty frightening. The public is typically skeptical of politicians, especially at the level of the Federal government. But now no one believes anything that’s said by this White House.