Trump’s a Nazi Sympathizer? That’s Right. ALT-RIGHT.

(New York, NY — August 15, 2017) – Dogged by allegations that he didn’t speak out forcefully enough against the country’s agents of evil and domestic terrorism, Chancellor Squirrelhead gave an impromptu press conference in Trump Tower today. And proceeded to hang himself by his own tongue. Flanked by Secretary of Transportation Elaine Chao and…

For Old Spicey, the Holocaust Was a Gas

(Washington, DC — April 11, 2017) – White House Press Secretary of the Week Sean Spicer today said that Adolf Hitler wasn’t quite as bad as Syrian President Bashar al-Assad. And he made this observation on Passover. Asshole. Old Spicey was referring to the April 4 attack by Droopy Dog on his own people; at…

Many Happy Returns from Dachau Gate Thieves

(Dachau, Germany — February 22, 2017) – More than two years after its disappearance, an important piece of history related to the Holocaust has finally come home. The iron gate from Nazi Germany’s Dachau concentration camp – emblazoned with the slogan “Arbeit Macht Frei” (Work Will Set You Free) – was stolen on November 2,…

Anti-Semitism a Grave Problem

(University City, MO — February 21, 2017) – Donald Trump (R-NY) today used the words “horrible” and “painful” to describe anti-Semitic violence, while at the same time evidence mounted that his Sicherheitspolizei – a branch of his Trumpist Brownshirts – were responsible for some of the same radical anti-Semitic terrorism he decried. The comments came…

D-Force – Coming Soon for an Immigrant Near You

(Washington, DC — February 18, 2017) – The Republican Flip-Flop Tour 2017 shows no sign of abating; if anything, it’s just now beginning to gather a full head of toxic steam. Both the Executive Branch (courtesy of Donald Trump (R-NY)) and Legislative Branch (courtesy of Paul Ryan (R-WI) and Mitch McConnell (R-KY)) are in full…

Trump to Journalist: Plant Your Kippah-Wearing Keister

(Washington, DC — February 17, 2017) – At his press conference yesterday, Donald Trump (R-NY), went completely off the rails in claiming he is definitely, absolutely, positively not an anti-Semite. Bad news for Chancellor Squirrelhead: If you have to go out of your way to proclaim that you’re not an anti-Semite, it means you’re an…

Trump Uses Electoral College to Combat Anti-Semitism

(Washington, DC — February 15, 2017) – At today’s press conference, standing side-by-side with Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, Donald Trump (R-NY) made two very important policy statements. Oy vey. Regarding the issue of peace in the Middle East, and specifically between Israelis and Palestinians, Chancellor Squirrelhead chose to eschew the two-state solution – a…