Chancellor Squirrelhead Attempts to CAPITALIZE on His Iran Threats

(Washington, DC — July 23, 2018) – Chancellor Squirrelhead sought relief from a very bad week – during which he committed treason while outing his complicity in Russia’s rigging of the 2016 presidential election. So, late Sunday night, while relieving himself, he decided to target Iran. “It’s ironic – or maybe a bit sick –…

Body-Slammer a Slam-Dunk for Montana COTUS Representative

(Bozeman, MT — May 26, 2017) – Congressional candidate Greg Gianforte (R-MT), 56, won the state’s special election for membership in the House of Representatives yesterday, beating back challenger Rob Quist (D-MT). But it wasn’t the drubbing Republicans had hoped for. The special election was called to replace Montana’s lone House member, Ryan Zinke (R-MT),…

Mueller to Noodle Around Trump-Russia Connection

(Washington, DC — May 18, 2017) – Former Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) Director Robert Mueller III was named as a special counsel yesterday by Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein, tasked to investigate Russia’s collusion with Donald Trump (R-NY) and his associates, including but not limited to interference in the 2016 presidential election. Sane Americans…

Squirrelhead Blows Up Syria

(Washington, DC — April 7, 2017) – Facing a horrific attack by the Syrian government on its own citizens using banned chemical weapons, Donald Trump (R-NY) yesterday sent 59 Tomahawk cruise missiles into the war-torn country, deepening America’s involvement in Syria’s six-year-old civil war while practicing a level of hyperhypocrisy not previously seen in human…

Trump Slams Terror in Saint Petersburg – No, the Other One

(Saint Petersburg, Russia — April 3, 2017) – A shrapnel-filled explosive device detonated today between two train stations in Russia’s Saint Petersburg, killing 10 and wounding more than 30. True to form, Donald Trump (R-NY) took to Twitter to share his misinformed and inappropriate musings just hours after the blast. The attack occurred on a…

I Spy … A Paranoid Orange Menace

(Washington, DC — March 5, 2017) – Your illegitimate presidential administration is barely six weeks old. You find your handpicked staff producing scandal after scandal after scandal. What’s the best thing to do? Invent a new, totally fictitious scandal! Wiretappgate seems to be the latest installment of the Donald Trump (R-NY) Show, as Chancellor Squirrelhead…

Anti-Semitism a Grave Problem

(University City, MO — February 21, 2017) – Donald Trump (R-NY) today used the words “horrible” and “painful” to describe anti-Semitic violence, while at the same time evidence mounted that his Sicherheitspolizei – a branch of his Trumpist Brownshirts – were responsible for some of the same radical anti-Semitic terrorism he decried. The comments came…