Chiefly Insane

(Kansas City, MO … or Kansas City, KS – February 6, 2020) – With their Super Bowl LIV victory parade behind them, the Kansas City Chiefs can now move on to their next order of business. Moving. On February 2, shortly after winning the Super Bowl by defeating the San Francisco 49ers 31-20, Chancellor Squirrelhead…

Meshuga Atlanta Massacre Misinformation

(Atlanta, GA — February 9, 2017) – Believing he’s not already seen as an out-of-control, pathetic, lying hypocrite, Press Secretary of the Week Sean Spicer has added to the Trump (R-NY) administration’s lore of alternative facts by making up yet another domestic massacre in an attempt to scare the hell out of the American people.…

Atlanta Burning

(Houston, TX — February 6, 2017) – The Atlanta Falcons suffered a 34-28 defeat yesterday at the hands of the New England Patriots in Super Bowl LI. It looks like Atlanta’s punishment is just beginning. The historic Super Bowl featured the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history (25 points; New England was down 28-3) as…

Trump Advisor Who Predicted Patriots Victory is a Real Doll

(Washington, DC — January 22, 2017) – Much was made of The Skeletal Kellyanne Conway’s attire during the inauguration of Donald Trump (R-NY). Investigators are now checking to see if her outfit may have a link to yet another scandal for the National Football League’s (NFL) New England Patriots. The Patriots knocked off the Pittsburgh…

Janay Palmer Boils Over Rice Firing, Suspension

(Baltimore, MD) – President Obama (D-IL/Kenya) will deliver a major address tomorrow about the country’s response to the ISIS Islamic Fundamentalist threat. Ukraine finds itself under siege from Russia, as events continue to spiral out of control and NATO eyes its options. But none of these issues are as important as the one that came…

White Powder Found Near Site of Super Bowl XLVIII

(Carlstadt, NJ) – Guests at several hotels near East Rutherford’s MetLife Stadium, the site of Sunday’s Super Bowl, reported finding “suspicious” white powder. Two of the hotels are located in Carlstadt; another is in East Rutherford; and a fourth is in Rutherford. Another sighting was reported at the Manhattan office of former New York Mayor…