Squirrelhead Blows Up Syria

(Washington, DC — April 7, 2017) – Facing a horrific attack by the Syrian government on its own citizens using banned chemical weapons, Donald Trump (R-NY) yesterday sent 59 Tomahawk cruise missiles into the war-torn country, deepening America’s involvement in Syria’s six-year-old civil war while practicing a level of hyperhypocrisy not previously seen in human…

A Not-So-Super Tuesday for the GOP Establishment

(Washington, DC — March 2, 2016) – On March 5, 1992, cartoonist Jeff Danziger of The Christian Science Monitor drew “The Tsongas Pronunciation Guide (A Random Tsample)” in honor of that year’s Super Tuesday contest. Playing on Senator Paul Tsongas’ (D-MA) name, he said that “Tsuper Tsuesday” was a “big deal in the Tsouth.” Super…

Republicans Flip Out as They Flip-Flop Away

(Wasilla, AK — June 30, 2015) – For the first time since it became law in 2010, Republicans are thankful for Obamacare. It covers whiplash. On June 16, Donald Trump announced his candidacy for President of the United States. During his choreographed press conference (he paid people to cheer him on), Trump accused Mexico of…

Latest POTUS Candidate May Ensure a Female President in 2017

(Seneca, SC — May 20, 2015) – Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) has alluded to an intention to run for President of the United States in 2016. And that increases the odds that the next President will be a woman. While Graham’s official announcement won’t be made until June 1, political pundits immediately began musing about…

Russia, Ukraine Complain about Shoot Down of Plane

(Kiev, Ukraine) – Just four months after a Malaysian Airlines jet went missing, the company is once again in the news. And, like last time, it’s not in a good way. Malaysian Airlines MH17 was shot down today, over the Ukrainian village of Torez, with a surface-to-air missile. MH17, a Boeing 777-200 en route to…

Exxon “Tanks” Alaska on Anniversary of Oil Spill

(Prince William Sound, AK) – Exxon today celebrates the 25th anniversary of the Exxon Valdez oil spill. The celebration isn’t a testament to time, and it isn’t a testament to the resiliency of nature. Rather, it’s a testament to how a major company can commit a major crime and get away with a slap on…