(Washington, DC – November 9, 2020) – Election 2000 was one of the most contested presidential elections in American history. In the end, the race went to the Republican candidate, Shrub (R-TX), and running mate Dick Cheney (R-WY), over the Democratic ticket of Al Gore (D-TN) and his running mate, Joe Lieberman (D-CT). On the…
(Washington, DC – November 7, 2020) – Four days after Election Day 2020, Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. was elected the 46th president of the United States today, bringing an end to the rule of Chancellor Squirrelhead, the least-popular president in the country’s history. At 77, Biden is the oldest person ever elected president. His 56-year-old…
(Washington, DC — July 23, 2018) – Chancellor Squirrelhead sought relief from a very bad week – during which he committed treason while outing his complicity in Russia’s rigging of the 2016 presidential election. So, late Sunday night, while relieving himself, he decided to target Iran. “It’s ironic – or maybe a bit sick –…
(Helsinki, Finland — July 16, 2018) – Chancellor Squirrelhead’s capitulation to Perestroika Putie at their Helsinki summit #TreasonSummit was thorough and complete, cementing his status as the worst president in American history. Not that he had to try very hard. Perestroika Putie has been let off the hook with regard to rigging the 2016 presidential…
(Brussels, Belgium — July 11, 2018) – When being interviewed by Geraldo Rivera in 1988, former presidential candidate Charles Manson asked, “What about NATO?” Thirty years later, that’s what everyone is asking. Instead of doing the sensible thing and disinviting him, NATO heads of state gave a warm greeting to Chancellor Squirrelhead at this week’s…
(Washington, DC – July 9, 2018) — In a made-for-TV event rivaling LeBron James’ classless “The Decision” from July 8, 2010, Chancellor Squirrelhead will announce his pick to replace the retiring Supreme Court justice Anthony M. Kennedy tonight at 9:00pm ET. The announcement will represent one more step in Chancellor Squirrelhead’s dismantling of the nation,…
(Lexington, VA — June 26, 2018) – The country’s Trumpist Brownshirts are continuing to exhibit their faux outrage regarding one of their own being turned away from a place of business based on moral conviction. Looks like lots of black pots are being called out this week. Republicans in the legislative branch continued to come…
(Washington, DC — January 21, 2018) – Day 2 of the Federal government shutdown arrived with Congress showing little or no movement on ending the standoff that has shuttered the Federal government for the first time since 2013. They can’t even agree on what to call #Shutdown2018 . For their part, Republicans are calling the…
(Charlottesville, VA — August 14, 2017) – Chancellor Squirrelhead broke his silence today over Saturday’s massacre at the white supremacist “Unite the Right” rally in Charlottesville (VA). Maybe he should have just kept his covfefeing mouth shut. Today’s statement addressed the sacrifice of the two Virginia State Patrol troopers who gave their lives in trying…
(Jerusalem, Israel — May 23, 2017) – All eyes were on Donald Trump (R-NY) today as the world expected him to do or say something inappropriate when visiting Israel’s main Holocaust memorial. He didn’t disappoint. Chancellor Squirrelhead is in the middle of his first overseas trip, and Yad Vashem , the World Holocaust Remembrance Center,…
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